A Walk in the Woods: Tennessee

A Walk in the Woods:

Times have been dark. Daylights savings and the beginning of winter are full blown now. Life is slow, times are cold, and well, that was just the half of it.

You ever had mono? I’m at three months now. It’s been hell; life changing hell. It’s like all the shitty moments I didn’t have over the past 6 years wrapped up into one neverending event. I forgot who I was. I got real lost down there. I honestly never thought it was going to end. I felt hopeless in the oddest way, like really long day dream, a trance, or a nightmare not bad enough to wake up from. Just existing…

Technically, I’m still dealing, but I’m starting to finally catch my breath.

Some days I wake up and feel so normal it’s like I’m on speed. I zig and zag like I’m playing a game.

Others feel like my head is in a washing machine. Brain filled with sand and dizziness like being on the ocean, my world feels like I’m watching someone else experience it. Like the Truman show. I hope you don’t ever have to know. But, that brings me to the rejuvenation. Eventually all things must end.

One step, one day at a time and I’m finally feeling the warmth in my fingers. I can feel vibrant thoughts, passions bubbling, I can feel my own energy starting to flow out of me yet again. I’ve missed it dearly. I’ve missed the old me, the one that fought for his ideas who got me here all bloodied and broken. He was a trooper, but he needed rest. A was given a cocoon to become something new, something stronger. I can’t wait for spring to spread my wings again. So many more things to do, never enough time.

Anyway. Just wanted you to know I’m alive and getting well! I haven’t been who I wanted to be these past months, but I guess that’s the way thé cookie crumbles. You don’t live the life you perfectly imagined, you live thé one that’s right in front of you.

Here’s some recap of the past few days or weeks, idk anymore.